Mickey Funny Status Messages

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
[Clear]
6

Search results for status messages containing 'Mickey': View All Messages
Page: 6 of 6

   messageicon No, I haven't been sick. I haven't been busy. I haven't been away on vacation. The reason I haven't returned your calls is because I can't stand you.
←Rate | 02-09-2013 07:04 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the ATM printed out the receipt showing my account balance, I really don't think the LOL at the end was necessary.
←Rate | 02-07-2013 23:51 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being fat is over weighted.- Elmer Fudd
←Rate | 02-07-2013 06:25 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon A flying saucer lands at a gas station. Two aliens got out. On its side were the letters "UFO." The gas station guy goes, "Does that stand for Unidentified Flying Object?" "No", said one of aliens, "Unleaded Fuel Only."
←Rate | 02-05-2013 16:53 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon The way I see it, is if there were no men in the world, the planet would be filled with nothing but happy fat women. And a shortage of batteries.
←Rate | 02-05-2013 08:35 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want your team to win a sporting event just tell me. I will root for the other team. That will guarantee a win for your team.
←Rate | 02-04-2013 12:00 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dan Marino's Love Child: There were no DNA tests. This came about when the mom saw the kid throw her bottle across the room in a perfect spiral hitting her dead center in the face every time.
←Rate | 01-31-2013 09:30 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rosie O'Donnell just won the Green Award for Conservation. It only takes two tablespoons of water to fill her bathtub.
←Rate | 01-31-2013 00:38 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girl sent me to the store to get her some pads. Brillo good?
←Rate | 01-30-2013 10:27 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon G0D has granted me the Midas Touch. So far today, everything I've touched has turned to gold. Wha? Oh. Heh heh. No more Cheetos for breakfast.
←Rate | 01-30-2013 05:56 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Was it THAT wrong writing, "To my sweet little Butter Face" on my girlfriend's Birthday card?
←Rate | 01-28-2013 09:29 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I were Superman, I'd forget about Lex Luthor, and instead, beat the living $hit out of every a$$hole who's ever abused a child.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 08:07 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Here are my 4 favorite quotes: " " " "
←Rate | 01-28-2013 07:29 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy Hump Day means zip to the 15% who work weekends, the 30% who do six days a week, 8% unemployed, 10% disabled, 15% on call, and the 20% who are retired. To the 2% that this actually applies to....bl0w me.
←Rate | 01-23-2013 10:27 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nicky Minaj is like Tang. She's dry, orange, and nobody actually likes her.
←Rate | 01-22-2013 10:38 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you use expressions such as: "My hubby ate four of the cupcakes I made...the little piggy!" Please delete from your friends list.
←Rate | 01-20-2013 07:16 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is everyone so down on Manti Te'o? When you get right down to it...all relationships are imaginary.
←Rate | 01-20-2013 00:58 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon The new season of American Idol displays all the calculated, boring insignificance of every season that's preceded it.
←Rate | 01-16-2013 20:27 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I told my hillbilly neighbor over and over, "You CAN'T go on someone's facebook page who lives in another country and type 'Dang foreigner!' in the comment box!"
←Rate | 01-09-2013 19:54 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay, so I signed up for Missionary work. Here I sit in Uganda and still no sex. Sheesh!
←Rate | 01-09-2013 08:34 by Mickey Comments (0)  


6

[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left