Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   ..... Wonder what would happen if a Pokemon Go character accidentally appeared in the middle of a busy freeway?

   " If we build it, They Won't Come." ............. Border Wall

   Just when you thought kids were actually beginning to enter into the world of reality ................ Pokemon GO

   Pokemon Go - Get your information stolen and get hit by a car.

   Bernie, The "Anti-Establishment" candidate ..... Just joined the Establishment.

   Three kinds of Betty Crocker cake mix are being voluntarily recalled by General Mills over concerns they could be contaminated with E.coli. Now that's an exciting new cake flavor if you ask me.

   Loving this new Hula-Hoop app

   You know those orange cones they put on the highway for you to knock down? I just beat my high score !

   If you can't love the one you want, love someone who looks like them and just squint a lot

   The economy sux so bad that, I am reciving per-declined credit offers in the mail...

   This morning I thanked the Starbucks barista and told him to have a magical day and the lady next to me waiting for coffee stared and said, "I could really use some magic today, could you wish me a magical day too?" Lady, sorry I am not a magician here...

   Being in Costco without family or friends is like being lost in a strange universe. Who am I going to share the poutine with?

   Pres. Barack Obama arrives in Dallas where he is expected to deliver a highly personal and emotional speech at a memorial service for the 5 slain police officers. Obama will also find out who shot J.R. Ewing too.

   My credit score is so bad I have started receiving pre-declined credit card offers!

   Wonder if it would become a national tragedy if a Pokemon Go Character appeared in the middle of a busy freeway?

   facebook doesn't allow breastfeeding photos

   I can't wait to see who wins the 100-Yard Dash From A Zika Mosquito in the Rio Olympics.

   I don't understand Pokemon Go AT ALL which I guess officially makes me middle-age.

   Lies I've Told A Lot: I acknowledge that I have read and agree to the above terms and conditions.

   Now I'm worried there's a Pokemon somewhere in my bedroom laughing at me naked.