Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Trust me. Tight fit jeans and loose fit skin are one bad combination.
←Rate | 07-20-2010 08:54 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just read that Facebook has reached 500 million users. Congrats to everyone who helped create history's largest stalker.
←Rate | 07-20-2010 08:53 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  

   messageicon Winners should have 2 things: Definite goals ...And the burning desire to achieve them
←Rate | 07-20-2010 08:03 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The funniest thing about this message is that by the time you realize it doesn't say anything you its too late for you to stop reading it you dumb f**k
←Rate | 07-20-2010 02:56 by Rachael Comments (1)  

   messageicon Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.
←Rate | 07-20-2010 02:54 by Rachael Comments (0)  

   messageicon The trouble with life is there's no background music
←Rate | 07-20-2010 02:51 by Rachael Comments (1)  

   messageicon Wondering if you plugged your nose and your mouth while you sneezed, would it come out of your ears or would your head explode?
←Rate | 07-20-2010 02:50 by Rachael Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you've seen one child on a leash, you've seen a mall
←Rate | 07-20-2010 01:38 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The YMCA has officially shortened it's name to "The Y". You know times are tough when letters are even getting laid off.
←Rate | 07-20-2010 01:29 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't understand the whole gay women play softball thing. Please explain to me because it's a bunch of girls who like to hold wood & catch balls in spandex on their free time...
←Rate | 07-20-2010 00:23 by @truebeachbabe Comments (0)  

   messageicon The BP oil is seeping into Bedrock. I'll bet Fred Flintstone is furious.
←Rate | 07-19-2010 23:58 by Aaron Comments (0)  

   messageicon wondering why Dora never tells her parents about the fox that keeps stalking her."
←Rate | 07-19-2010 23:44 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  

   messageicon I caught myself updating my Facebook status in my sleep & I think I actually would've posted it if the rumble strips on the highway didn't wake me up first.
←Rate | 07-19-2010 23:34 by Vito Comments (0)  

   messageicon Some couples hold hands because theyre afraid that if they let go theyd kill each other
←Rate | 07-19-2010 23:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:40 by Uche617 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If I was a bird, I know who I'd s**t on first...
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon “Even in a happy relationship, it's seems to be possible to have a wandering eye or even crave affection from another person.
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:09 by abbybaby34 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Get a backbone and say NO if you don't want to do something, ignoring calls and texts is a cowards way out. Grow a pair!!!
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:08 by bach Comments (0)  

   messageicon A woman should know how to look like a girl, how to act like a lady, how to think like a man." :)
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:03 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon wants you to know that Alcohol is Never the answer. Unless, of course, the question is "What is C2H5OH?"
←Rate | 07-19-2010 21:57 by Felesar Comments (0)  

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