Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off everything and let the problem solve itself?
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:39 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Since the world is ending in 2012, I've decided to buy everything at places with a "Don't pay until 2013" plan.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:36 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon I think that all I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:30 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon I appreciate the police escort, but shouldn't they be in front of me?
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:29 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Everyone is always asking something for a friend. Friends are the most curious, ignorant ba$tard$, aren't they?
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't like exercise so I'm not going to walk a mile in your shoes. I'll judge you standing right here.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Summer: the time of year when parents realize just how grossly underpaid teachers actually are.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 05:13 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  

   messageicon I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was blaming you.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 04:55 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon they put on $100 and still are proud to swipe their foodstamp why cant they get a job?
←Rate | 06-10-2010 00:34 Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks Bill Nye should figure out how to plug up the oil
←Rate | 06-10-2010 00:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thank you Flyers for a great season. The best I've ever seen. But hey Blackhawks I hope you enjoy drinking the beer from the cup. We peed in it.
←Rate | 06-10-2010 00:06 by SLAYER Comments (3)  

   messageicon People laugh because I'm different, I laugh because they're al the same
←Rate | 06-09-2010 23:52 by @seddy90 Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives
←Rate | 06-09-2010 23:32 by @seddy90 Comments (0)  

   messageicon You were born as an original. Don't die as a copy
←Rate | 06-09-2010 23:16 by @seddy90 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Mom used to let me lick the mixing beaters when she'd bake a cake.....seems like it would have been better bonding between us if she'd shut the mixer off first though....
←Rate | 06-09-2010 22:30 Comments (0)  

   messageicon You know it's a bad day when a three legged camel points to your girlfriend's crotch and asks for his foot back !!!
←Rate | 06-09-2010 21:29 by k9cop2529 Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's all fun and games until you notice the *rocket* in your son's Lego launchpad came from the drawer in your nightstand.
←Rate | 06-09-2010 21:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I am standing out in the wind with my pants down and letting the wind blow me! Don't Judge me!
←Rate | 06-09-2010 20:56 Comments (0)  

   messageicon seen some miniature american flags for sale today, said made in china, classic!
←Rate | 06-09-2010 20:29 by Phelpsy Comments (0)  

   messageicon believes that knowing when to say nothin' is not easily learned and impossible to teach......
←Rate | 06-09-2010 20:26 Comments (0)  

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