Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I love my girlfriend! but my wife hate her.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 11:04 by Qan Comments (0)  


   messageicon John Mellencamp was a visionary because he knew that Cougar in 2010 would have a very different meaning
←Rate | 07-18-2010 11:00 by Leeferd Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let's change the name of the Republicans and Democrats to DUMB & DUMBER.....
←Rate | 07-18-2010 10:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A teacher asks ”wot part of the body goes to heaven first?”A child replies”feet- coz every nite I c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 10:02 by Craig Comments (0)  


   messageicon so as I am leaving to go to work I go to unlock the door to leave...I can feel heat radiating from the door from the outside..I have always been told that if you feel heat you should not open the door....so I guess I should turn around go back to bed I sh
←Rate | 07-18-2010 09:10 by jamiegulledge Comments (0)  


   messageicon not a Russian spy; regardless of what the news says!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 09:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon have I told you lately that I love you....? No? thats because I can't handle your miserable, twisted, soul destroying face anymore! Oh and by the way....I'm telling someone else I love them while you pack!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 08:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do you give to a man who has everything? A burglar alarm.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 07:47 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Try telling that to a heart attack victim.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 07:03 by jediganesh Comments (0)  


   messageicon its time for you to go now..you've been there to support me and when I couldn't control myself you took the load in your stride, but now after 7 years you've become just too damn clingy....goodbye my sweet little Spiderman underpants...I will miss you
←Rate | 07-18-2010 04:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I wanted to know whats on your mind I'd splatter it on the wall and see for myself.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 04:38 by Alex Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a tree falls in a ocean does it not make potato chips?!?! yeah I'm drunk
←Rate | 07-18-2010 04:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon people saymotivation doesnt last.well,neither does bathing-thats why we recommend it daily.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 02:45 by hamiisi Comments (0)  


   messageicon life has no remote.change it yourself
←Rate | 07-18-2010 02:43 by hamiisi Comments (1)  


   messageicon Next time you shake someones hand, keep in mind that that is probably the hand they masturbate with...
←Rate | 07-18-2010 01:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon so glad he can't get anyone pregnant from poking all these lovely ladies on fb...he hopes! O.o
←Rate | 07-18-2010 01:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why when you wanna break up you hear this "u will never find someone like me?" NO Serious do you think that I leave you For being with someone like u????!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 00:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Team Edward? Team Jacob? How about Team Dracula you pansies!!!!
←Rate | 07-17-2010 23:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So many things remind me of You, mostly when I sit on the toilet.
←Rate | 07-17-2010 23:35 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon the only thing that keeps water from being a ho is the 2
←Rate | 07-17-2010 22:42 Comments (0)  



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