Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Will Smith should win an Academy Award for acting like Hollywood's held him back.

   I guess properly inflated balls really do make a difference. Who knew?

   I find it ironic that Tom Brady looked so deflated after the loss to the Broncos.

   The Patriots have been Decheated by Denver.

   Did you ever notice when you push old people down the stairs they scramble to grab the railings???

   FACT: I prefer Dairy Queen Blizzards than hearing you constantly complain about how Monday's suck.

   Let's all be fair, I hope all Americans get to see Sarah Palin's High School diploma.

   One insomniac, two insomniacs, three insomniacs, let's count all the insomniacs on Facebook.....

   I hear Sarah Palin loves Honey Nut Cheerios.

   wondering if Sarah Palin can still see Russia from her house.

   being cremated is my last hope for a smoking hot body!

   I just saw a guy take a bite of Kit Kat bar without breaking it apart first! Sir, we have live in a society with rules, please adhere to them.

   Where are the socialist snowplows at?

   Maybe Jada Pinkett Smith should receive an Oscar for acting like an idiot.

   i know have a epipen, my friend gave it to me as he was dying... It seemed very important to him that I have it

   Somtimes I get the feeling that maybe the love of my life got stuck up in a Condom

   I tried cumming in the air tonight, and all I did was make a huge mess, F**k you Phil Colins !

   Where I come from, Decaffeinated means a cow who just had a calf.

   The voices in my head tell me not to listen to the voices in my head, and now I don't know who to listen to anymore

   I've dated a vegan and a vegetarian, and please believe me, they do put meat in their mouth...