Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Never chase them, quickly replace them. Mistakes? Nahh, I don't retrace them. I just move on and mentally erase them.
←Rate | 03-05-2011 01:36 by Seddy90 Comments (1)  


   messageicon ready to have male pattern baldness become "in style"
←Rate | 03-05-2011 01:34 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon -Grand Theft Auto is the only way I can express myself freely without any consequences....
←Rate | 03-05-2011 01:04 by johnny b Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nice guys finish last... because they make sure their women come first ;)
←Rate | 03-05-2011 00:05 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women don't want to hear what you think...Women want to hear what they think- in a deeper voice."
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:52 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon just ripped a hole in my American Eagle jeans. I'd be mad but I think they just went up in value..
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:39 by Vivus Comments (0)  


   messageicon When moving walkways in airports warn me to watch my step because, "The walkway is coming to a end", my first thought is "I'm moving 2 mph, that is ridiculous." Then when I get to the end all I can think is "Oh crap, I better not mess this up."
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:36 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon This time of year every store is advertising as "your one stop shop!" Really? I'm in college, I'm pretty sure that's the liquor store.
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:33 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Notice Liars have 2 or 3 stories like a big house!!!!
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:32 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear slut, Has your right leg ever met your left leg?
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:29 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I smile in the middle of telling a story, not because I'm fondly remembering something, but because I'm impressed with the BS I am creating on the spot."
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:27 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?"
←Rate | 03-04-2011 23:23 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everyone's self worth should only be measured by how useful they would be in the zombie apocalypse
←Rate | 03-04-2011 22:20 by SlowMotionNinja Comments (0)  


   messageicon silence is golden, but duct tape is all kinds of cool colors now!
←Rate | 03-04-2011 20:28 by beth julian Comments (0)  


   messageicon just watched the new gay television series "leave it to beiber"
←Rate | 03-04-2011 20:23 by J0eBl0ws Comments (0)  


   messageicon just because the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, doesn't mean its not fake field turf.
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Car manufacturers need to get with the program! I can't be the only one that wants a Death Ray option.
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Grand Theft Auto is the only sourse in which I am able to express myself freely without any consequences
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Take on Glee: So it's people singing, dancing, and having sex, all with a guy in a wheelchair watching. Kinda like an orgy at Larry Flynt's house.
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:31 by Joshman Comments (0)  


   messageicon custom fitted, custom kitted, wood grain, custom errything, whats that on the seat? custom mustard stain.
←Rate | 03-04-2011 19:19 by Aaron Comments (0)  



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