Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Whats the difference between arrogant and ignorant? Brithish and Welsh
←Rate | 06-21-2010 18:08 by DJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon Reason to smile: Every seven minutes of every day someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:58 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon Man made alcohol, God made marijuana, who are you going to trust?
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:57 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks the fastest way to being happy is to make others happy. You go first.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:52 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon You moon the wrong person at the office as a joke just once, and suddenly you're not "professional" anymore.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:51 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon I didn't outsmart you. You just outdumbed me.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:47 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon all I want is a comfy bed, a kind word and unlimited power.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:44 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon wondering who left the bag of idiots open.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:43 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon Been on hold so long I forgot who I called. Got a credit card out and my pants off but that doesn't narrow it down much.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 17:42 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon I went to have Botox, the surgeon said to me "That's $8000 dollars please" I couldn't even looked shocked.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 15:52 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon considered being a stay-at-home mom but then I found out the kids would be there too.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 15:41 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hired Helen Waite as my assistant. So if you need anything from me you must go to Helen Waite.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 14:45 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon if you're ever feeling down just remeber: you were that ONE sperm that made it.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 14:40 by Phire Comments (0)  

   messageicon Osama Bin Ladin has announced he's giving up. It's too tough to compete with B.P
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:30 Comments (0)  

   messageicon What is the difference between the English soccer team and an albatross? An albatross has 2 good wings.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:27 Comments (0)  

   messageicon t is my sincere hope that your day is full of love and that you are a positive influence on the people who look up to you. It is also my sincere hope that Perez Hilton pours kerosone all over himself, down his throat and in his socks & immolates himself
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon IEBER FEVER: Symptoms include elevated temperature, undergarment wetting and nine octave higher range while screeching. For those in proximity of sufferers symptoms include nausea, vomiting and desire to kick Justin Bieber in his empty sack gonads
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:18 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Lady Gaga is a Yankees fan. Point: Mets.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:17 Comments (1)  

   messageicon What is the difference between English soccer and Bill Clinton? Bill Clinton can score.
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:17 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Does the North Korean World Cup team get to choose their method of execution when they get home?
←Rate | 06-21-2010 13:16 Comments (0)  

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