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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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I lost my Viagara down the toilet....Now I have hard water!
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03-09-2011 15:30 by
Kelso
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I hear drinking wet cement can get you really stoned!!
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03-09-2011 15:26 by
kelso
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Justin Bieber's first name isn't really Justin... all his previous boyfriends nicknamed him that for some small reason.
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03-09-2011 15:25
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Today marks the anniversary of the death of The Notorious BIG. Dinner tonight will consist of t-bone steak, cheese, eggs and Welch's grape.
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03-09-2011 15:20 by
Marshall the Great
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If you think I talk too much, let me know. We can talk about it.
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03-09-2011 15:16 by
abbybaby34
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If you can't afford to go on vacation, you can always drink until you don't know where you are!
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03-09-2011 15:15 by
abbybaby34
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I don't have an attitude problem. I have an attitude that you have a problem with. Therefore, I just have an attitude!
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03-09-2011 15:13 by
abbybaby34
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The moment someone tells you that you're not good enough is the moment you know you're better than them.
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03-09-2011 15:13
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Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic.
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03-09-2011 14:46 by
ANGELA
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Just plead the Fifth -- or drink it -- either way.
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03-09-2011 14:45 by
ANGELA
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Excellent time to become a missing person.
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03-09-2011 14:43 by
ANGELA
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Test tube babies shouldn't throw stones.
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03-09-2011 14:40 by
ANGELA
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If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.
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03-09-2011 14:37 by
ANGELA
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I got kicked out of the Casino for misunderstanding the use of a crap table
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03-09-2011 14:19 by
Rudi
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Some people should really consider giving up AIR for Lent... just sayin'
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03-09-2011 14:17 by
WillHale
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So who's going to give up Facebook for Lent? Now there's a sacrifice. ;)
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03-09-2011 13:52
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Snooki is going to be hosting WWE raw on monday. Finally, a good match for Hornswoggle
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03-09-2011 13:31 by
JeremyCakes
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That awkward moment when Eminem eats M&Ms, Flo Rida goes to Florida and 50 Cent has 2 quarters
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03-09-2011 13:10 by
follow BOSNIANBEAUTY29
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Everyone has the power to make someone else happy. Some do it by entering the room, while others do it by leaving.
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03-09-2011 13:09 by
follow BOSNIANBEAUTY29
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The awkward moment when you accidentally call your teacher 'Mom.'
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03-09-2011 13:08 by
follow BOSNIANBEAUTY29
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