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08-30-2010 04:10 by lemonpillow
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If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that.
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06-04-2010 14:00 by lemonpillow
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I said to my girlfriend "Just remember,my grandmother is a bit old & hard of hearing. So speak nicely,speak slowly & speak loudly." I then whispered to my perfectly capable grandmother "My girlfriend is slightly retarded." Oh,what fun I had.
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04-22-2010 05:01 by Lemonpillow
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I will never forget what my dear old Grandad said to me just before he kicked the bucket.He said, "Sarah... how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
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04-15-2010 13:47 by lemonpillow
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Tip to reduce weight: first turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right, repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.