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I now identify as someone who is disappointed in everyone. I don't care about your bathrooms, I am just gonna pee where I want. 
That awkward moment when you see a commercial for "Designated Survivor" and wished it was reality.
Interviewer: You responded to my question too briefly and you were hesitant. Me: I was thinking how stupid was your question!
Never owned a single pair of shoes in my life. I just keep renting them from the bowling alley.
When I was young I kept asking myself what I wanted to be when I grew up. Now I know the answer: I want to be young.
waiting for Godot.
thinks the world is her oyster. Now if only she could find a shucking knife.....
no expectations = no dissapointments
ıs ndsıpǝ poʍu
handing out sence of humor transplants and you guys are first in line
had some eggs at a place called Sam N Ella's this morning. I'm not feeling too well now
just measured Jared from Subways commercials waist size he actually got bigger
heading down to Fraggle Rock.....
When your a standup comedian your not going to make everyone laugh. When your up there on stage half the audience should be laughing, and half the audience should be horrified.
can you make a caption that I can actually read ?
people.with over attitude mid- finger salute..!!:D
saying of course, the Squirrels!! gotta save the Squirrels..those flying ones are some cool gliding rodents
No wonder Bob Geldof is such an expert on famine. He's been feeding off "I Don't Like Mondays" for 30 years.
the victim of the rules he/she lives by!
so busy , in fact I have more on than a redundant stripper. 