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Well here I am, sitting on the pavement with my pork pies, sandwiches, & beer. Flying my union jack flag, cheering at the top of my voice with British pride as the procession goes past. Dont you just love muslim funerals. 
A chinese couple had a black baby guess what they named him? Sum ting wong
Breaking News: The State of Indiana just made "smear the queer" the official playground game.
Why do women fart after they pee? They can't shake it so they blow it dry.
Gov. Chriatie pledges $15mil to repair NJ boardwalk. Will raise money by going on a diet...
Just read a report that said 86% of holy water tested had fecal matter in it. Holy shít!!
Relationships are like fat people... they just don't workout !!
Lakers...Celtics....Lakers......Celtics...............um....Lakers.....Celtics............WHEN DA HELL DOES FOOTBALL season start!!!
electrocuting the engineers.
Fox News is blaming Obama for Miley's twerking.
Katy Perry's new video is so unrealistic, all those people exploding and not a Muslim in sight.
FYI Obama has given billions in corporate welfare...^
going to drink wet cement and get really stoned.
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either. Just leave me alone.
almost killed today when she fell off a horse. Thank god the Kmart employee saw me, came over and unplugged the thing!
Police were called to a day-care centre today.... A two year old boy was resisting a rest.
whats BROWN and Rhymes with Snoop???? Dr. Dre
brought my date a footlong sub thinking it would score me major points, but apparently I went to the wrong jared . . .
A moment of silence for all our pu$$y whips bro's who are enduring the ECLIPSE premier!
Funny how Facebook is Fantasy Island for some. They pretend to be something they are not on FB but in real life are real douchebags! 