Funny Status Messages

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 3451 of 5594

   messageicon The internet: where the men are men, the women are men, and the children are the police.
←Rate | 10-24-2010 14:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon one of those "Real Men Of Genius" Bud Light is talkin' about.....
←Rate | 10-29-2010 01:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon won't just hit the spot. He will kill the spot & dress inappropriately at the spots funeral.
←Rate | 11-16-2010 23:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon you can have my FourLoko when you pry it from my cold, dead drunk hands...
←Rate | 11-17-2010 21:25 by kauffman Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Jim Rockford was such a good detective, how come he could never figure out that he wasn't going to get paid?
←Rate | 11-27-2010 19:16 by Luka Comments (0)  


   messageicon found a short cut for this years Marathon
←Rate | 11-30-2010 01:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only # game I am playing is Barcardi 151, Seagrams 7&7, Weller 107 and maybe Maddog 20/20!!!
←Rate | 12-09-2010 16:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Be careful when someone wants to take you to ANOTHER LEVEL, I listened to that and now I am in another level, but much lower than I was before!
←Rate | 05-03-2010 05:54 by Mduduzi Comments (0)  


   messageicon not a mover and a shaker but instead I'm a wiggler and jiggler.
←Rate | 05-07-2010 16:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon   If you steal a clean slate, does it go on your record?
←Rate | 05-21-2010 17:36 by Mduduzi Gama Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wonders if there is a cure for "dumbassness" if so, I know a few people who need a dose.
←Rate | 06-03-2010 19:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A new study found that the average person has lost an hour of sleep at night during the recession....the silver lining though is that most of them can just sleep in late the next day.
←Rate | 06-04-2010 14:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon As a lover, I'm about as impressive as a magician on the radio
←Rate | 06-11-2010 02:04 by @seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon why is there a diet version of everything good except chocolate? hmm...where does Hershey's keep their "suggestion box"?
←Rate | 08-31-2010 22:53 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon it's 3a.m...shouldn't YOU be baking?
←Rate | 09-15-2010 14:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm watching this show on stalkers, still haven't seen any of you yet.
←Rate | 09-23-2010 16:59 by badd status Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know things are tough when my retirement plan consist of playing the lottery :(
←Rate | 09-29-2010 09:53 by Mark Comments (0)  


   messageicon Schizophrenia - together I can beat it.
←Rate | 10-13-2010 14:20 by jimbo Comments (0)  


   messageicon i'm not an alcoholic the world just feels better when i'm drunk
←Rate | 10-18-2010 02:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry to all those that thought they were going to loot my stuff once the Apocalypse started last night..........Apparently I'm still needed here for something.
←Rate | 05-22-2011 11:55 by LuLu\'sBitch Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left