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My dog is like a member of the family... but I'm not sure which one.
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10-03-2010 01:59
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Ever notice how trying to give your heart to someone who doesn't want it is alot like trying to give medicine to an infant?
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10-04-2010 14:32
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Girls we love for what they are; men for what they promise to be.
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12-08-2009 17:44
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I'm my best friend, and I'm my worst enemy
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12-16-2009 10:19
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Octomom we don't care about your body, how are you spending my mony on your kids?
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01-28-2010 12:18
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Eating Ramen Noodles with a spoon is like going the speed limit, sounds like a good idea but won't get you very far.
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02-22-2010 12:08
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akin it all day thinkin "dang I must look good today, everybodys checkin me out"! Come to find out...I've had a half eaten candy cane stuck to my butt all day... thanks kids!
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03-05-2010 17:33
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Picking up dog poo in the dark is like playing the worst kind of Where's Waldo imaginable
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03-21-2010 18:08
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Somehow, my inner beauty's not increasing my confidence when I'm walking into the sauna.
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03-24-2010 09:04 by
enchant
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Its gonna be one of those days... I just got up and missed the floor
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03-29-2010 08:03
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Gin makes you Sin. And it's also an easier word to rhyme than vodka or bourbon.
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09-02-2012 22:42 by
minnie haha
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GOING CHEAP,!!! all docking stations for iphone 4,,,
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09-14-2012 08:01
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Keep your head high and your middle finger higher!
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09-26-2012 18:47 by
Jackoo
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I know there's no such thing as evolution because if there was my Facebook page would've grown a "punch" button by now.
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10-01-2012 18:43 by
hihuggiehi
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I don't miss anyone from the past... not even me.
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10-06-2012 07:07 by
Czovczov
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Remember to smile at your enemies. It makes you the bigger person, plus your smile will be prettier than their frown. They hate that.
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10-11-2012 08:14 by
Marshall the Great
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Well I guess it's ,,,," No more Mr. Nice-Guy "...... ~ Mr Nice Guy's eulogy
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07-19-2012 09:03
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Everyone seems Normal until you get to know them!!!
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07-23-2012 07:56 by
Abraham Lincoln
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May the best drugs win..... London2012
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07-24-2012 04:32
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It's really very simple; I will love you unconditionally as long as you just do everything I say.
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08-13-2012 00:57
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