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happy and I knew it and then I clapped my hand, everyone thought I was weirdo :/
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10-03-2011 10:26 by
Muzammil
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Some people are wise, Some are just other wise.
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10-10-2011 19:46
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There's no law against sticking to your guns, but make sure you've loaded your brain before you start firing off your mouth.
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07-23-2011 21:34 by
BEGO
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If I ever lose a hand I'm definitely replacing it with a single nunchuck on a chain
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07-28-2011 16:28
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I offend people in a nice way
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04-12-2011 17:45
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I don't think I should be held responsible for the things I say to fill awkward silences.
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05-18-2011 11:37 by
Marshall the Great
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Brexit could be followed by Grexit, Departugal, Italeave, Czechout, Oustria, Finish, Slovakout, Latervia, Byegium. Only Remania will stay.
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06-28-2016 23:29
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Go fund me = internet panhandling
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07-25-2016 12:14
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I watched some of the debate last night...I kept on waiting for someone to say "Live from New York it's Saturday Nite"!!!!! But it never happened.....
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10-10-2016 14:16 by
Jerry Carter
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Airport security asked me if I've seen anything unusual...I just paid $18 for a coke & a ham sandwich...Let's start with that.
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11-02-2016 20:53
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Meanwhile on Facebook someone has made a casserole
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03-01-2017 11:17
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I drank so much Vodka last night I woke up with a Russian accent.
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01-16-2016 06:27
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I drive safer when there's food on the passenger seat than when there's a person sitting there.
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02-06-2016 18:11
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Why is it....Biggie and Tupac get gunned down but nobody will shoot Kanye West.
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02-19-2016 17:54
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I certainly hope the douche who stole my credit card enjoys his $14.03 shopping spree.
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03-03-2016 17:03
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Whenever someone invites me to their home and I see more than 3 cars parked outside, I keep driving.......just in case it's an intervention.
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05-24-2016 22:46
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If by "social drinker" you mean I like to drink instead of being social, then yes, I'm a social drinker.
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06-05-2015 10:47
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French toast is regular toast that surrendered.
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06-26-2015 11:14
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Look, all I'm saying is that the dinosaurs didn't drink alcohol and look what happened to them.
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12-16-2015 07:14
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Divorce---When being wrong every day for being alive isn't working for you.
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01-16-2015 08:33 by
SEAN
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