anonymous Funny Status Messages

   tall, dark and handsome

   dangerous to your health.

   listed as in a relationship with his blackberry device...

   not your daddy

   making a sex tape and shooting up heroin with Miley Cyrus

   getting Jiggy with it!

   hates your extended network.

   what really sank the titanic.

   picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue!

   out joyriding in your car.

   always late. My ancestors arrived on the Juneflower for cryin' out loud!

   let the dogs out

   a PC

   busier than Mr. Jackson at a daycare!

   As I'm getting older I've noticed my memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used

   living on the magic island of awesome

   i am sick , radiating moon beams from my television ..reinforce my mass produce neurosis .....filter through bacon pies and and down spouts of grease help my shoes walk another day ..pass fears and smiles of everyday people

   pointing blow dryers at passing cars.

   Playing x-box.. Err, I mean Lifting Weights

   the walrus