anonymous Funny Status Messages

   must be stored in a cool dry place away from sunlight.

   dancing naked on your roof.

   the answer

   I pretend to work since they pretend to pay me...

   out discovering new fears.

   being chased by a hungry pack of wild poodles!

   says it's a dog eat dog world and I'm wearing milkbone underwear.

   having a great time controlling your mind right now.

   if its a long walk on a short beach, do we just pace back and forth..

   wants to play co-ed naked twister with a couple hot chicks.

   taking a walk outside her mind

   asks, "What do you get when you cross ketchup with wasabi? WASSUP!"

   perfecting secretly sleeping at my desk.

   the weapon of choice.

   Same Great Taste 40% Fewer Calories, 30% Less Fat.

   said that the day we had a black president would be the day pigs fly. Well, Swine Flu.

   ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, TREE TEQUILA., floor

   "insert clever remark here."

   the other white meat.

   saved a lot of money by switching to NO car insurance