Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

   Just so you know, if I were in shark infested water I would be ALL the way on the boat before removing my regulator and talking to the camera.

   My Man Crush Monday is: Obama. I hope a rock falls, and crushes his head.

   Surprised someone hasn't capitalized on a workout video for these sign holders.

   has enough wiper wash for 78 butterflies, after that I'm screwed!

   Government cheese makes the world a better place!

   Ok gang, help me get in the loop. Is it considered taboo for Asians to drive vehicles other than a Honda or a Toyota?

   I judge a hotel by the complimentary shampoo and conditioner.

   This is one of those times FB needs to tag my location as "in the middle of nowhere".

   When you're working out in 108 degree heat and have to pull up your soggy underwear after going #2 FML

   fixing something with WD-40 and a Craftsman wrench.

   An American blue collar boy's simple pleasure: AM country classics!

   You know you have Southern Roots, when you try and eat cornbread with your Capt'n Crunch.

   You can always tell the pessimist on a cruise ship. He's the one wearing a shark suit the whole time.

   I always skip a few slices of bread as a quality control measure in a loaf. This step is to insure freshness.

   My hats off to all the guys who only have AM radio in their work trucks...yeah I'm listening to Merle Haggard also!

   Dance your cares away Worry's for another day Let the music play down at...

   Has anyone ever completed a round of anti-biotics?

   "Sharks are like dogs, they only bite when you touch their private parts"-Shark Week lesson of the day

   In the spirit of Father's Day, my best advice to you: "Keep your "business" in your pants, and always wash your hands".

   there a market for a limo "General Lee" where you consume alcohol from a Mason jar and have direct access to a "Dixie" horn? One can only dream...