I hit a coyote with my car on the way to work this morning. I tried to miss it but it was going to fast. It might have had something to do with that ACME rocket strapped to his back
I'm not saying that you and your girlfriend are unatractive, but when you two got into that physical altercation at the bar, every single person there immediately called PETA except for Michael Vick and that's only because he had already wagered on her
I'm so cold that I decided to start my own non-profit today. It's called PETAELG. That's People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals with the Exception of Lying Groundhogs
I just picked out a Valentines Card from the Ben Roethlisberger collection. It came with a roofy, two advil for the day after and a do-it-yourself police report..