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   messageicon People who confuse the word "burro" with "burrow" don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.
←Rate | 06-05-2020 08:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I googled my symptoms into Web Md. Turns out I have Gary Busey .
←Rate | 06-25-2020 23:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tried to make my own hand sanitizer but I think I just made a margarita.
←Rate | 06-27-2020 22:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The worst part about working from home is when your coworkers clog the toilet
←Rate | 07-06-2020 12:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel like I'm watching a tv show called "Lockdown Got Talent" because this lockdown has people thinking they're gym instructors, chefs, dancers, etc...
←Rate | 07-06-2020 19:32 by Gabe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Brooks Brothers just filed for bankruptcy, so now I might never be able to use this $50 gift card on one sock.
←Rate | 07-10-2020 08:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hate is too powerful an emotion to waste on somebody you don't even like.
←Rate | 07-16-2020 05:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Supermoon was OK... But according to Rotten Tomatoes, still way better than Supermoon v Batmoon.
←Rate | 11-14-2016 20:00 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon What if Ghosts try to kill you only because they want you as a friend? You ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself.
←Rate | 11-26-2016 03:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll be home for Christmas.....and in therapy by New Years.
←Rate | 12-08-2016 09:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Things Irish people simply won't do on St. Patrick's Day: 1) Drink green beer. 2) Twerk with leprechauns. 3) Spend $40 on dollar store stuff.
←Rate | 03-14-2017 04:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've started visiting orgies dressed as a Ninja-Turtle! I'm really coming out of my shell these days!
←Rate | 11-16-2018 07:56 by Truman Comments (0)  


   messageicon OMG I can't believe I just did that. I called someone without texting first to see if it was ok that I called them. Yikes!!!
←Rate | 11-16-2018 16:53 by Frank Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not so great minds also think alike!
←Rate | 11-29-2018 07:42 by Truman Comments (0)  


   messageicon My teenage son says that fanny packs are back in style at his high school. I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT MY ENTIRE LIFE!
←Rate | 11-30-2018 11:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some girl just asked me out, well she actually told me to get out of my store, but I know what she really meant
←Rate | 12-10-2018 19:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I need a vacation that I may or may not ever come back from.
←Rate | 12-13-2018 13:11 by Kisstopher707 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Three things I'm grateful for, 1. Family 2. Friends 3. Caller ID to advoid family and friends.
←Rate | 12-14-2018 04:19 by Joker Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do we say that an alarm clock is going off when really it's coming on?
←Rate | 12-14-2018 07:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Do not touch" must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.
←Rate | 12-16-2018 05:24 by Joker Comments (0)  



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