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   messageicon I feel sorry for the last man on earth. A lot of women really hate that guy.
←Rate | 10-26-2017 22:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Justin Bieber is coming out with an 'Unplugged album'? I hope it's the microphone that they unplug.
←Rate | 02-10-2018 10:50 Comments (1)  


   messageicon I fell asleep reading my hard copy of "A Christmas Carol". The book slid off my lap and landed square on my big toe! Man, that hurt like the dickens.
←Rate | 12-12-2019 16:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bees: why are all the humans disappearing
←Rate | 04-01-2020 12:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who else has been drunk the entire month of Mapril?
←Rate | 04-21-2020 07:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon All our dogs think we are staying home every day just for them and all of our cats are thinking we got fired from our jobs because we are the losers they always knew we were
←Rate | 04-30-2020 01:13 by Rickster Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now that I’m 40, I’ve had to change my safe word to ‘my knees! my knees!’
←Rate | 06-19-2020 08:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just saw a fat dude lick pizza grease off his shirt so that's the last time I eat in front of a mirror.
←Rate | 07-17-2020 09:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon News flash for Jack and Jill: You don't go uphill to find water.
←Rate | 03-08-2019 08:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't care about a politician's tax returns. I want to see their IQ test results.
←Rate | 04-07-2019 20:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I tried a striptease for my wife last night but it didn’t go well. I got my shirt stuck on my head, and by the time I got it off, she fell asleep.
←Rate | 04-11-2019 09:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Recently I've been reading the book of Jeremiah, because not only was he a bullfrog, he was a good friend of mine as well.
←Rate | 07-26-2019 15:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've decided to kill off a few characters in the book I'm writing. I really think it will spice up my autobiography.
←Rate | 12-20-2019 12:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are all the good open-minded liberals moving to Canada? What's wrong with Mexico? If we look at the map, it appears Mexico is about the same distance from the U.S. as Canada. So what's up?
←Rate | 11-09-2016 13:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Depending on how you look at it, half of 8 could be 4, 3, or 0.
←Rate | 11-26-2016 03:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why don't keyboards have a ".com" key on them now? Come on nerds!
←Rate | 01-06-2017 10:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder if China was clever enough to make the Mongolians pay for their wall?
←Rate | 01-12-2017 13:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I'm going to buy one of those new 3D printers. Then I'll use it to print another 3D printer and then return the original printer to get my money back.
←Rate | 01-14-2017 18:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't drink water anymore, not after what it did to the Grand Canyon
←Rate | 02-02-2017 07:14 by Mikey c Comments (0)  


   messageicon For those of you who don't have a significant other to spend Valentine's Day with, kindly resist the temptation to brag about it.
←Rate | 02-06-2017 18:47 by Mickey Comments (0)  



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