anonymous Funny Status Messages

   A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.

   eating out..at home. ;)

   trying to wipe with plastic wrap.

   not yet rated.

   has just finished installing a flux compacitor in his DeLorean and is headed back to 1985

   a Figment of your imagination

   [censored]

   doing what her rice crispies tell her to....

   Tough decisions... Beat off in the shower and waste water or use Kleenex and add to landfill? What can I say? I love Mother Earth and big titties

   rejecting your reality and substituting his own.

   allowed to talk about fight club

   going back to the future

   fed up of talking about himself in the 3rd person. Stupid (name)!

   blaming it on the rain.

   talking to his inner voices..& they don't like you

   thinking so what if Jesus turned water into wine... I turned a whole student loan into beer once. your move Jesus.

   wondering what they are saying behind my back

   "trying to find a better ""status""... "

   the cause of your drinking problem.

   walked into a shop this morning when the woman working said "if you need anything, I'm Jill". I haven't met anyone with a conditional identity before.