Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I love how flat-earthers believes the other planets around us are round.
←Rate | 11-18-2019 01:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Jack Daniels: I'm holding one of those workouts like Kap where I drink a lot to become a spokesman. TIA.
←Rate | 11-17-2019 21:42 Comments (0)  

   messageicon When they heard about his visit to the hospital, hell immediately started to construct a wall.
←Rate | 11-17-2019 19:41 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The hearing are not as boring as one of his speechs.
←Rate | 11-17-2019 17:55 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson are going to merge and become one company. Their new name will be "Titty Titty Bang Bang."
←Rate | 11-17-2019 16:18 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Funny how when I was a kid we use to call Facebook group therapy.
←Rate | 11-17-2019 14:33 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The first guy who bought pants had to go to the store without pants on, that's just science....
←Rate | 11-17-2019 13:14 by MrSharp Comments (0)  

   messageicon Some woman just sent me an I'm that said, "You're such a Dollface" I said, Thank you xoxo!" She goes, "By Dollface, I mean Chucky."
←Rate | 11-17-2019 10:58 by BobBogin Comments (0)  

   messageicon "No thanks. Not this time. Nah, I'm good. I had that done last time. No thanks. No. I'll have my mechanic check that. No thanks. No thanks. No thanks. Next time. No thanks. No thanks. No thanks. I just want the oil change."
←Rate | 11-17-2019 10:53 by BobBogin Comments (0)  

   messageicon Louisiana has turned blue. Congrats!
←Rate | 11-17-2019 10:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm afraid I will get called as a witness at the impeachment hearings....I don't know anything, either.
←Rate | 11-17-2019 08:12 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I know his chest pain was not cause by his heart, because he doesn't have one
←Rate | 11-16-2019 23:05 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I put a lot of basil, parsley, rosemary and thyme in my old Volkswagen Beetle... became herby.
←Rate | 11-16-2019 22:09 Comments (0)  

   messageicon light switch
←Rate | 11-16-2019 20:49 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Roger Stone did nothing wrong! Stupid do nothing Dems!
←Rate | 11-16-2019 17:22 by @real_defender Comments (0)  

   messageicon Darn it's cold outside!.....which I just thought I'd post for those of you who haven't been outside lately.
←Rate | 11-16-2019 09:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon How is witness intimidation a crime? That makes no GD sense!
←Rate | 11-15-2019 22:45 by @real_defender Comments (1)  

   messageicon Before Facebook Instagram and all these social networks we have today, when I was a kid if we went around and showed all our friends our Selfies they would think that we were really committed, or should be.
←Rate | 11-15-2019 12:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Ok, I'm a Boomer. But not a Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup with cubed white meat chicken casserole Boomer.
←Rate | 11-14-2019 06:51 by IARU Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't understand people who take a hundred selfies and then post the best one? I mean how is anyone going to recognize them in real life if they probably look more like the other 99 they didn't post?
←Rate | 11-13-2019 23:10 by Moon Comments (0)  


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