Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't

   loves the smell of burning rubber, but I really should of told her the condom split

   Doesn't understand why the Mr. Softee guy didn't laugh when I suggested he try Viagra

   about go over to my grandmas house at 3 A.M in the morning so I can wake her up and get on her nerves!

   old gregg mother lickers

   He just wants 2 kids but never NO WIFES!!!!

   walking like an egyptian

   if I could rearrange alphabet, I would put 'U" and "I" together

   considering a career at Hogwarts

   Naturally the world doesn't revolve around me, I MAKE it revolve around me!

   wonder what the Elves think of Rudolph after listening to "Roxanne" by The Police?

   Next stop... THANKSGIVING! Stand clear of the food and cold please!

   When can we expect Randy Moss to ask Randy Moss how Randy Moss feels about being waived?....

   And ps... you should'nt sing a song with an "s" in the title if you have a lithp!

   Been thinking of things I could do today, leaning towards going to Victoria's Secret and looking around.

   having a hard time deciding between a Boston Pancake or a German Knuckle Sandwich!

   Wish in one hand & crap in the other... See which gets filled first.

   I Dont know what annoys be worse?!! The viral fake group chain messages I get in my FB inbox or the Fact that some of you Dummies respond to them like your gonna get a Reply Back!!!

   feels like a marshmallow , short fat and white

   I think more people would go to the library in school if they spiced it up a little bit... like maybe putting and open bar or strip club in it.