Trump Filter: ON | OFF
Search Messages:
it me or this presidency has experienced more Virus out break since AIDS? Remember the Swine Flu, bird Flu, Housing Bubble Flu, Bank bail out Flu, and my favorite was when Congress Flew 
Today a 5 foot tall grashopper spit in my face, I went to my doctor and he did tell me he heard there was a really nasty bug going around
Ladies: you should be grateful for even the smallest of things a man does for you. Why? Because he took time out of his day, to make your day more beautiful and special.
A woman interviewing me for a job, was hot, but a real b!tch. She goes, "Are you bi-lingual?" I didn't even want the job at this point, so I said, "Yes, I can lick ur pu$$y and ur a$$hole. "SECURITY!!!!"
I 'm trapped in a maze, therefore I am a-maze-ing.
"Glee" after the Super Bowl? From politics to TV shows, Fox continues to polarize the U.S.
did it like this, I did it like that, I did it with a whiffle ball bat, So....
When the Snake is alive, the Snake eats Ants. When the Snake is dead, Ants eat the Snake. Time can turn at any time. Don't neglect anyone in your life........
I just read Snooki from "Jersey Shore" hates her nickname, and wants to go back to using her real name: Bilbo Baggins
Short guys are like the fat chicks of men.
My morning run was so cold my ballsack now looks like my wife's cameltoe…
Thinks Oscar Pistorius killed his girlfriend because she didn't like him. She was 'lack-toes' intolerant.
Build the wall out of solar panels. Make God pay for it.
I never judge people by the color of their skin unless they have a spray-on tan.
I know I have to watch Borat 2 to get the full story on the Rudy situation. But until the movie comes out, I'm gonna assume Rudy is guilty because it pisses people off.
If the vaccine contains a chip, I hope it’s salt and vinegar.
the Catholic Church gets a lot of bad press, but if it weren't for my parish priest I wouldn't even know how to give a good hand job.
Why oh why do people use an apostrophe to make a word plural? An apostrophe s is only used to show possession (Jane's books) or a contraction for "is" (she's late for work). Get it?
if you're a single 30 yr old male living alone in a 1 bedroom apartment, despite your past, you should go ahead & add your name to the sex offender registry for future reference.
You Canadians spell humor as "humour." American humor is better. We can do it without u. 