Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Fish can drownd if you pull them backwards in the water. Your welcome.

   WARNING!! As of today - Facebook will automatically start dragging Earth into the Sun. To change this option, go to Settings > Planetary Settings > Trajectory then UNCLICK the box that says ' Apocalypse.' Facebook kept this one quite.

   How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her.

   I am risen today too... if it lasts for more than 4 hours, I need to go to the ER though.

   Love is in the air...and i'm wearing a gas mask.

   Atheists - 2 Harold Camping - 0

   Hey! It's called facebook, a social networking site, NOT faithbook, a cram your religious beliefs down my throat site. Hiding!

   Religion is a crutch for weak-minded people who can't accept reality

   Am I being picky when I say "Please leave 'Christ' in Christmas"? I know it's a little thing, but, by writing 'X-mas' it seems to me that we are taking out the whole reason we even celebrate this holiday just to save a few key strokes . Just my opinion of

   The bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range

   gunna dress up as kanye west for halloween and go around telling people " ima letchu get back to trick or treatin in a minute but, barrack obamas daughters have the best halloween costumes of all time, of all time!!!"

   n't making any New Year's resolutions. I'm still working on the ones from 2003.

   I wish I was made up of 5 midgets, like a human Voltron.

   YAY! I just won Australia's Next Top Model.... no wait, they was a mistake? How could this happen?

   I befriended Tom from Myspace on Facebook lol

   Going to go back in time and have sex with all the Golden Girls, and Angela Lansbery.

   just got a painting of David Carradine and I hung it in my closet.

   Penn State University.......Pedophile U

   You and your fat girlfriend standing next to each other looking like the number 10

   ................................................................U know when guys pee and they shake their pen!s for that last drop? ..............................................That's how much gas I got for 2 dollars.