Vybe Funny Status Messages

   blames everyone for his problems."Except Shaggy, because we all know it wasn't him".

   Honey Boo Boo's mother has a boyfriend and you're single. Just let that sink in..

   somewhere two dudes just ordered mochas from Starbucks and are calling them "brochas" and high fiving

   Before updating my status l always test it on my wife first. If she rolls her eyes and leaves the room, l know it has potential.

   going to watch the Mars Rover landing tonigt just to find out if chicks really have 3 boobs there.

   Oh christ it's Olympic Soccer. If I wanted to watch someone struggle to score for 90 minutes, I'd take some of my single friends to the bar.

   wondering if anyone's ever gotten someone to do heroin by doing "heeeere comes the airplane!" with the spoon

   just heard Anderson Cooper announced he's gay. Don't worry ladies, you still have a shot at Lou Dobbs.

   Oh great it's Summer...that means hearing about tomatoes for 3 freakin' months!

   doesn't really understand the big deal about walking a tightrope across Niagara Falls. I've been married for 14 years, try walking that tightrope Wallenda!

   Am I the only one when they heard about the hand & foot delivered to Ottawa I thought " that's sick!" But when the other set arrived in Vancouver 10 days later I thought "Wow, Canada Post Sucks!"

   Went into my laundry room this morning where I have 4 bins segregated into Whites, Colours, Blacks, and Tans. Come on Whirlpool! Can't we live in a world where all laundry is created equal?

   can't figure out if that kid on American Idol is Milli or Vanilli?

   a lot of the ladies at the office have choose to dress Slutty for International Women's Day...that's what I believed anyway.

   Watching American Idol and I was really hoping that first girl could sing.

   wonders if there is a connection beween Jennifer Hudson's Weight loss & Hostess filing Chapter 11

   Flash Mob. My Place....bring Wrapping paper!

   Tiger finished Yesterday with a 69. There has got to be a joke in there somewhere.

   hears Gold dropped 104.00 per ounce today...let's start working on the economic bail-out package for Mr. T.

   heard in the news today that Ecstasy is being used to combat cancer. I'm not sure if the researchers testing this have ever done Ecstasy before, but if you get the right hit of E and you will forget that you have anything wrong with you.