Samir Momin Funny Status Messages

   I'd never tell anyone to go to hell, but I might suggest a Carnival Cruise....

   I see you liked my status... I accept your invitation for sex.

   3 Lions looking like 11 helpless kittens..... : /

   If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?

   its so hot out, I'm sweating like a prostitute in a church...

   1 Hairspray and 2 tons of make up still dont replace brain!!!

   A man goes into a library and ask for a book on suicide....The librarian replies "F*ck off! you wont bring it back!"

   i lost my phone. let me call it. oh crap its on vibrate! EVERYONE SHUTUP!!

   Wondering why people with food stamps drive escalades?

   When you love her you're F-ing her, when you don't she is F-ing you! What's up with that?

   So if someone is born deaf, what language do they think in?

   I zone out once my teacher says "This will not be on the test."

   Rihanna wants a rude boy...Didnt she get her a$$ whooped by one already?

   Taking a picture of a flower does not make you a photographer......

   Apple Bottom Jeans,Turban With The Fur,Got The Whole Mosque Looking At Her....

   Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I'm kicking your ass!

   Considering the fact that god is the creator of everything....Does that mean he's chinese then.... ??

   Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then they proceed to tell you why it isn't.

   Premature Ejaculation ads make car rides awkward.....

   What do you call a black man flyin a plane???? A pilot you RACI$T !!!!