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i can't sing but I do have other oral talents.
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02-18-2014 13:39 by
linda
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Glittery eyeliner makes my daddy issues sparkle.
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06-25-2012 14:35 by
Linda
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Everyone's gynecologist uses the term 'battle damage,' right?
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06-18-2012 15:06 by
Linda
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I don't mind when people make kitchen jokes about women, but when they make jokes about women driving... Well that's when I run you over.
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06-17-2012 12:17 by
Linda
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I just found spider crawling up my leg. I wanted to kill it but I missed so I cut off my leg instead.
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06-16-2012 12:11 by
Linda
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When a guy says he doesn't eat pu$$y,I always say...well, nothing, because he's pretty much dead to me at that point.
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06-14-2012 10:56 by
Linda
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If I don't look like I barely survived a natural disaster after we've had sex, you need to try harder.
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06-14-2012 10:40 by
Linda
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I usually watch porn on mute; so the neighbors can hear me climax.
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06-11-2012 14:38 by
Linda
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If I'm down on my knees, I'm probably not one who's begging.
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06-08-2012 13:43 by
Linda
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Sometimes I squirt mayonnaise across my breasts so I don't forget what it's like to have a boyfriend.
126
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06-07-2012 14:02 by
Linda
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V@gina is my weapon of choice.
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06-04-2012 14:09 by
Linda
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You have to work to get me and you have to work to keep me.
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05-30-2012 13:33 by
Linda
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used to be indecive but now she's not so sure
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09-21-2011 12:23 by
Linda
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The heat wave continues! It's so hot in New York City that the Statue of Liberty was asked to blow out her torch.--Joan Rivers
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08-03-2011 21:25 by
Linda
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Yeah, yeah. It's Hump Day, but get off my leg, please. I don't like you that much.
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04-13-2011 08:40 by
Linda
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