anonymous Funny Status Messages

   Asks .... Why dont they make mouse flavoured cat food?

   Give Yourself a Haircut Tip # 1: Don't

   wondering...if jellyfish eat jellybeans..do they get gas?

   If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.

   Do "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" and "The Alphabet Song" have the same tune?

   Who decided that a round pizza should be put in a square box?

   questioning her invisibility potion

   not completelly useless,she can be used as a bad example

   wondering what humanitarians eat.

   won't lower his standards to raise yours

   making hyperactive mooing noises and bouncing off walls

   could use a few drinks.....everyday!!

   The lunatics are running the asylum.

   wishing my mouth had a backspace key.

   tried snorting coke today, but the ice cubes got stuck in his/her nose!

   loving and hating facebook -On the downside, it's loaded with sexual predators. On the plus side, it's also loaded with sexual prey.

   asking those who believe in psychokinesis to raise his hand.

   was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that's when he realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly-swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater.

   saw a guy at a party wearing a leather jacket and he thought, ‘That is cool.' But then he saw another guy wearing a leather vest and he thought, ‘That is not cool'. Then he figured it out: ‘Cool' is all about leather sleeves.

   feels stupid when he writes the word banana. Its like, how many na's are on this thing? ‘Cause I'm like ‘Bana … keep going.... Bananana … damn.