I figured out why I'm fat! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says "For Extra Volume and Body". I'm going to start using Dawn dish soap. It says "Dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove".
I was making dinner when a pan suddenly caught on fire. I don't know which is worse... the fact that I almost set my kitchen ablaze, or the fact that my first reaction was to move my beer to safety.
At the mall this weekend.... The angry parents screaming for their son "Marco!!!" did not find it amusing when I kept yelling "POLO!!!" back at them from my dressing room.