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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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I'm playing hide-and-seek with my kid... He'll never find me... He's not old enough to get into the bar...
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03-05-2011 12:54 by
Sierota
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do you think that butterflies get tattoo's of women's butts?"
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03-05-2011 11:05 by
Dylan Bosch
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If you didn't hear it with your OWN ears or see it with your OWN eyes, don't go passing it on with your OWN mouth!"
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03-05-2011 10:52 by
Dylan Bosch
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PMS: stands for either "Pass My Shotgun" or "Potential Murder Suspect". Take your pick.
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03-05-2011 10:50 by
Dylan Bosch
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thinks I've found the cure for stupidity... a shock collar. And if it doesn't cure them, at least you got a good laugh watching them twitch."
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03-05-2011 10:45 by
Dylan Bosch
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AT&T makes it very easy to play hard to get.
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03-05-2011 10:22
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I'm thinking about going out tonight, because after all, the Beastie Boys DID fight for my right to party....
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03-05-2011 10:09 by
scottyp
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Everytime I get on facebook, I feel like I am shopping at Lowe's for bathroom updates.
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03-05-2011 09:51
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Bert and Ernie...it's ok to be gay, it's 2011. Just get married and get it over with.
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03-05-2011 08:50
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statistics show that 1 out of 20 of us live next door to a conivcted pedophile, not me though, I live next to two stunning 16 year olds.
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03-05-2011 08:32 by
Joe
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it just me or does Oscar the grouch look like a big pile of weed?
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03-05-2011 04:38
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Im not fat I'm just easier to see
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03-05-2011 04:35
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Thumbs up if your a Mex Thumbs down if you wanna kill all Mex
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03-05-2011 03:54 by
hovo
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checked in to a hotel and I asked if the porn channels could be disabled…She replied “Sick-o”!!!
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03-05-2011 03:16 by
@Gnarleycharley
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Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.
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03-05-2011 02:50 by
hovo
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Spongebob, it's been over 11 years. You're not getting your drivers license.
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03-05-2011 02:13 by
Seddy90
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Never chase them, quickly replace them. Mistakes? Nahh, I don't retrace them. I just move on and mentally erase them.
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03-05-2011 01:36 by
Seddy90
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ready to have male pattern baldness become "in style"
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03-05-2011 01:34 by
ff1241
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-Grand Theft Auto is the only way I can express myself freely without any consequences....
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03-05-2011 01:04 by
johnny b
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Nice guys finish last... because they make sure their women come first ;)
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03-05-2011 00:05 by
Dylan Bosch
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