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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Friends are like condoms: They protect you when things get hard.
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03-09-2011 06:43 by
Sorrel
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Two women are sitting in church. One leans over and whispers to the other, "My butt is going to sleep". The other replies, "I know, I've heard it snore three times"
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03-09-2011 06:43 by
Rudi
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I am so clever sometimes I don't even understand what I'm saying.
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03-09-2011 06:36 by
Brafty Crastard
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This world would be slot nicer if your parents didn't have kids
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03-09-2011 06:30
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My wife has got a Licence To Kill. Or Driving Licence as she likes to calls it.
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03-09-2011 06:02 by
@clarkysj
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Cotton is getting expensive huh... If only there was a way to get people to pick cotton for free...hm
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03-09-2011 04:08 by
Herbncheese/oscar
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Called in my Napalm Strike and fried a whole bunch of Burritos.
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03-09-2011 03:42 by
TB
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Apple and Blackberry should team up and make a phone called the Pie.
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03-09-2011 03:15 by
@DonSixx
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Keep calm and mentally undress your celebrity crush
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03-09-2011 03:14 by
@DonSixx
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That awkward moment when your parents are looking over your shoulder at your Facebook page, and you dont know what to do..
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03-09-2011 03:09 by
@DonSixx
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Dear Superman, I understand... I have a weakness for a certain type of rock too. Sincerely, Lindsay Lohan..
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03-09-2011 03:08 by
@DonSixx
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When I sing I think I sound like an angel.. (; When really, I sound like a dying walrus!
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03-09-2011 03:04 by
@DonSixx
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If I die, I'm gonna become a ghost....... and watch attractive people shower....
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03-09-2011 03:01 by
@DonSixx
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If I had nickel for everyime you made me angry, I'd put them in a bag and beat you with them.
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03-09-2011 03:00 by
@DonSixx
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feeling like a boss when you type without looking and you dont make any mistakes
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03-09-2011 02:58 by
@DonSixx
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African mother to her child: "You better be happy you're that skinny, there's fat kids in America that wish they were as skinny as you!"
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03-09-2011 02:57 by
@DonSixx
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Sticking your hand up in the air, and looking at it for no reason while you're lying in bed
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03-09-2011 02:56 by
@DonSixx
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The only pick up line guys will need on December 20th, 2012 is --> "let's live every day as if it's our last"
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03-09-2011 02:56 by
@DonSixx
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Some girls needs to stop freaking out about being called "dude". Just keep calm, it's basically a unisex term
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03-09-2011 02:54 by
@DonSixx
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Elementary School: YAY CRAYONS! =) Middle School: Crayons? What am I, 3? -__- High School: HOLY SH*T, CRAYONS!
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03-09-2011 02:53 by
@DonSixx
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