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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Don't waste your time on someone who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
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03-23-2011 12:12 by
BEGO
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Facebook should change ” It's complicated ” to ” It's confusing & stressful. “
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03-23-2011 12:10 by
BEGO
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If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments or a court date.
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03-23-2011 11:50 by
Jason Biaza
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My hamster died today. He fell asleep at the wheel.
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03-23-2011 11:35
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You can't hide redneck under a three piece suit
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03-23-2011 11:19
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Moms have "mothers day" Dads have "Fathers day" Lovers have "Valentines day" what do single men have?...Palm Sunday
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03-23-2011 10:53 by
SlowMotionNinja
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Having one of those days where I'm seriously considering swallowing a handcuff key....Just in case.
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03-23-2011 10:51 by
Chuck
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Roses are unicorns, violets are green, welcome to the party, I'm Charlie Sheen.
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03-23-2011 10:27
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as a male I kinda get offended when a girl asks me to show her my abs ..Thats kinda like me asking a woman to show me her titts.
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03-23-2011 10:17
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Michael Jacksons twin sister died... R.I.P Elizabeth Taylor...
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03-23-2011 10:13 by
boo
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as a male I get offended when a girl asks me if I have abs..thats kinda like me asking a woman what size are her titts ..
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03-23-2011 10:12
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In 2 years, the "situation" will change his name to the "cancellation" followed shortly by the "bankruptcy declaration"
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03-23-2011 10:06
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you know your ugly when the dog has to close his eyes to hump your leg
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03-23-2011 09:57 by
tigertracks103
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Elizabeth Taylor dead? I thought she had been dead for years.
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03-23-2011 09:36 by
Doc Noland
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Qhaddafi has vowed to defeat the NATO forces. In support of his troops, he has issued them state of the art sling shots and water pistols.
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03-23-2011 08:54 by
Jeffrey Brooks
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Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'
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03-23-2011 07:20 by
smdk
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Why is Obama so interested in "liberating" Libya anyways, is he planning a vacation there?
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03-23-2011 06:57 by
Bill
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When someone tries to shoot at Colonel Gadaffi,do his bodyguards need to shout 'Gadaffi duck' ?????
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03-23-2011 06:54
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I wonder if I'll ever be mature enough to use a stud finder without first pointing it at every guy on the job and saying, “This thing is broken!!!” (for us females!!! :)
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03-23-2011 06:44 by
Hot Tea
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I just found out there is an "acceptable" amount of radioactive iodine in water.
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03-23-2011 03:25 by
@daddybullfrog1
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