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I do more drinking before 9:00 am than most people do all day. 
Happy Easter Yolks!
If I dont see you this Easter, Hide your own balls
Too many hollier than thou people with no sense of humour around.
Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs. Happy Easter!
They tell us not to put all our eggs in one basket, then Easter comes and they only give us one basket!
sitting here watching out the window as the neighbor kids are finding the "chocolate" eggs I put out.. they came out great. Ex-lax was alot harder to mold than I thought it was gonna be...
Success is a process... During that journey sometimes there are stones thrown at you, and you convert them into milestones
just broke my damn thumb again!! Really need to take it out my a*se before I sit in future..
Dear Bible, you forgot to include us in your story. Sincerely, the dinosaurs
Happy Easter and remember kids, watch out for Obama supporters. They will take 1/2 your eggs and give them to the kids who were to lazy to hunt for their own......
poking things that confuse me with a stick.
May all your beans be jelly and may no bunny poop in your basket.
Q: What's the difference between Hitler, Stalin & Obama?... A: We know where Hitler and Stalin were born.
So what I have observed is that the Michelin tire guy pretty much pulls tires out of his rolls of fat and throws them at his enemies. Wierd.
The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
I was looking through and fondeling melons today at Wal-Mart.
proposes that if someone pokes you, you should have the option to kick them in the groin or at least in the shins. Let's make this as real as possible.
dear portuguese easter bunny , dont hide to many eggs in my sweetbread because then there will be less sweetbread and I'll be pissed , thank you :)
Don't cops have something better to do than arrest non-violent casual Marijuana smokers?
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