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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Monday is the strongest day of all the weekdays, even though it is cursed by every other person in this world, it still exists
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04-28-2011 22:34 by
BEGO
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Some guys think all they have to do is try hard to get a girl, but what they don't know is the most important part is keeping her
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04-28-2011 22:27 by
BEGO
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Obama was confused, it's not his "Birth Certificate" it's a "Gift Certificate"...
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04-28-2011 22:21
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I heard the Royle wedding is having a horse drawn carriage or Prince Charles just calls her Camilla
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04-28-2011 21:36
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The only thing more interesting than the royal wedding is... Ooh look, the dog is chasing his tail again!
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04-28-2011 21:20 by
JaxWylde
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Ukrainian Mail-Order Brides is the way to go
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04-28-2011 21:17
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Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
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04-28-2011 20:48 by
Mahdi H
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Still waiting on the United States to hold concerts for money to donate to Alabama and those affected in the horrible tornados. We do it for everyone else for any other reason right?
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04-28-2011 20:31 by
ESH
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Peppermint Schnapps, the mouthwash you can swallow
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04-28-2011 20:01 by
Nunthewizr
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rRjection is tough, I heard that your hand fell asleep on you last night
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04-28-2011 20:00
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Due to the highly confidential nature of my job, I am not allowed to know what I am doing.
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04-28-2011 19:23 by
Massena43
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Wanna get laid? Just crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!
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04-28-2011 19:22
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all the QUEEN'S horses and ALL the QUEEN'S MEN could not get me up at 4am for THOSE wedding SHENANIGANS!!!
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04-28-2011 19:09
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Nobody says that you are dumb. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how to wave goodbye.
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04-28-2011 19:00
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You're lucky to be born so beautiful, unlike me, who was born to be a big liar.
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04-28-2011 18:48
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Now accepting applications for FWB. Several positions open. Please email me photos and resume.
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04-28-2011 18:38 by
Gil
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The only Royal Crown I'm interested in at 4am is some Crown Royal..
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04-28-2011 18:09 by
Wolf
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Twitter was invented to teach women how to communicate silently in 140 characters or less.
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04-28-2011 17:26 by
Gil
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im two short of a three sum. wheres ben&jerry?
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04-28-2011 17:19 by
ashcashftw
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i dont get it? if pandas eat bamboo all the time why are they so fat???
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04-28-2011 17:17 by
ashcashftw
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