Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Guys don't post stuff like ☆ BEAUTIFUL☆ FATHER☆ AWARD ☆ on eachouther's walls with the whole ˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•٠·˙ crap after it.  We show each other love by posting, "Dude, you're an A$$!"  
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:34 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Women, before you get mad, remember, God and Adam were calling Eve 'Woman' long before she started getting all power hungry, emotional and irrational. So think about that, the next time your man says 'Woman, make me a sammich!'" -- 3 John 1:12
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon has Finally figured out the difference between us. You're me if I tried too hard!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:30 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering, would It be fun if we started calling gynecologists, "tw@t dentists".
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:29 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys don't post stuff like ☆ BEAUTIFUL☆ FATHER☆ AWARD ☆ on eachouther's walls with the whole ˙·٠•●♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥●•٠·˙ crap after it.  We show each other love by posting, "Dude, you're an ass!"  
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:28 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Having a wireless mouse makes it way too tempting to throw it across the room when my computer gives me trouble."
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:25 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm a little tea pot, short and stout... Consequently, my brother the beer keg gets all the chicks."
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:23 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon Deadliest catch, without the crabs, we're almost out of gas, call the Arabs!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 20:03 by Lozo Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know that instant disgust you feel when you find a hair in your food? Yeah thats exactly what I feel when I see you.
←Rate | 05-11-2011 19:12 by @carlynikole Comments (0)  


   messageicon I heard that Jehovah's Witnesses don't like census takers. They are opposed to someone they don't know knocking on their door.
←Rate | 05-11-2011 18:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon To show my support for all the democracy protesters in the Middle East, I am shaving my balls today(They were getting hairy and I needed an excuse)
←Rate | 05-11-2011 18:16 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I was younger, I wanted to be a famous writer like Hemingway. I got the alcoholism down, just not the hunting and suicide part
←Rate | 05-11-2011 18:12 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't consider my dog my child. My child would not be able to knock you down like Ray Lewis and crush your bones with her jaw at 9 months
←Rate | 05-11-2011 18:08 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stupid people exist just to make us feel better about ourselves. Thank you, stupid people!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 17:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I finally figured out how to f*ck myself... Take that, people that tell me to f*ck myself!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 16:21 by danny Comments (0)  


   messageicon Damn... You looked pretty until tht free trial of Adobe Photoshop expired,
←Rate | 05-11-2011 16:14 by tylerbur! Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is like a Rubix Cube, there are countless numbers of wrong twists and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it...
←Rate | 05-11-2011 14:54 by CJ in CALI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love Pandas, They're so chill. They're like "Dude, racism is stupid. I'm white, Black, & Asian..."
←Rate | 05-11-2011 14:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We have a game show called Survivor in America....you can win 1 million dollars for doing something for 2 weeks that most people on this planet call "life"!! It simply amazes me how spoiled, ungrateful and lazy we are!!
←Rate | 05-11-2011 14:11 by urboyblue Comments (0)  


   messageicon To those who worry about haters I say: You will never reach your DESTINATION if you keep stopping to throw stones at every dog that barks at you.
←Rate | 05-11-2011 14:02 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  



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