Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon When everyone is out to get you, paranoia is just good thinking.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 21:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just watched a commercial asking if I suffer from schizophrenia. I think i'm okay, but will run it past the other voices...
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:51 by joann Comments (0)  


   messageicon They should have captured Bin Laden alive and made him continually go through airport security for the rest of his life.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:40 by jdpower Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow, Paul McCartney got married again?! Really seems like this relationship has legs.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:37 by jdpower Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Thor" is the #1 movie -- proving there's nothing Americans love watching more than an immigrant who's good with a hammer.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:35 by jdpower Comments (0)  


   messageicon I thought about being atheist...then I realized they dont have any holidays
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:31 by BigBunny Comments (0)  


   messageicon the akward moment when you meet someone of the Internet N they look nothing like their pics
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:15 by Serina Comments (0)  


   messageicon You guys, hear, about these, rogue commas, going around?
←Rate | 05-18-2011 20:10 by jdpower Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay everyone, with all the lovely things I have been purchasing on credit, please join me on Sunday May 22nd for a garage sale at 25% off. PLEASE!
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon That tv show 'The Mentalist' is nowhere near as good as the title suggests 
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:55 by Seanoc Comments (0)  


   messageicon MLIA view Today, one of my friends said to me if you say "Gullible" really slow, it sounds like ice cream. I said "Ice Cream" really slow and then I said, "Wow! It does!" He responded with, "No, you're supposed to say gullible slowly." And I reply with,
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:51 by TZ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Too Stupid to Understand Science? Try Religion.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:23 by Bridget Comments (1)  


   messageicon If the world is going to end May 21st it could at least end at 7AM not 6PM so I dont have to go to work.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon How I eat my ramen: 1. Boil water 2. Eat dry ramen noodle block 3. Drink boiling water 4. Snort seasoning packet 5. Cry myself to sleep
←Rate | 05-18-2011 19:04 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon That blonde's cleavage in that engery drink commercial WORX for me.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 18:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wise beyond my beers.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 18:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Barack Obama - The first black man that has ever had to convince the world he did do the killing.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 18:24 by Awe Comments (0)  


   messageicon This weekend Skynet becomes self-aware and starts Judgement Day while Obama sleeps on the decision about turning it off. Meanwhile, the Terminator is running loose in California knocking-up anyone that gets in his way.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 18:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Schwarzenegger, You were a 'Running man' from your 'True Lies',and your 'Predator' ways will have you spending your 'End of Days' with 'Junior'. Good thing it wasn't 'Twins'.(mood:first mistake was going 'Commando')
←Rate | 05-18-2011 17:34 by RUDEDOG Comments (0)  


   messageicon The speed in which a woman says "nothing" when asked "What's wrong?" is inversely proportional to the severity of the sh!tstorm that's coming.
←Rate | 05-18-2011 17:15 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  



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