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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Dear a$$hole on your bike in front of me at the stop light; yes I can read your shirt, I'm so amused sincerely your wife!
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05-25-2011 19:45 by
Teresa
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thinks Facebook should add another option for Friends Requests... WHO ARE YOU?
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05-25-2011 18:55 by
Bridget
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Wish I could change my relationship status to "batteries dead" LOL
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05-25-2011 18:54 by
bridget
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I was gonna buy a copy of 'The Power of Positive Thinking', and then I thought, what good would that do?
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05-25-2011 16:29 by
J. BIAZA
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Health plans are like hospital gowns…You only think you're covered.
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05-25-2011 16:21 by
J. BIAZA
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I'm searching Facebook for people named Hontas, just because I think it would be cool... to poke a Hontas.
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05-25-2011 15:36 by
L.T.
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Congrats to Kim Kardashian & Reggie Bush uh Cristiano Ronaldo, I mean Nick Cannon? Nick Lachey? Ray J? Miles Austin? Oh Kris Humphries.......
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05-25-2011 13:38 by
sully
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Everybody needs to believe in something, I believe I'll have another beer.
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05-25-2011 13:31 by
Will
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Life was so much easier before security cameras
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05-25-2011 13:14
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It would be pretty cool if, on her last show, Oprah ripped off a mask and it was Michael Jackson.
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05-25-2011 12:24 by
sully
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Some things should not be abbreviated like Save The Dates (STD) or Future Mother in Law (FML)
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05-25-2011 11:33 by
Michael
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Dude why are you making that face? You look like you're gambling on a fart.
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05-25-2011 11:32 by
Ronnie V.
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Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber. -Plato
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05-25-2011 11:18
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I would punch you straight in the face but my hand would get covered in the $hit you talk.
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05-25-2011 11:07 by
seddy90
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What a great world it would be, if the only complaint was bugs on the windshield.
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05-25-2011 11:02 by
Goodeolboy
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Cinnabun- $1...cup of mocha coffee- $.50... tripping over the rug, dropping the Cinna bun, spilling the hot coffee on my shoes and yelling "$h!t" out loud in front of 3 customers......priceless
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05-25-2011 10:52 by
Kyle
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A Man who treats his lady like a Princess was surely brought up in teh hands of a QUEEN!
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05-25-2011 09:19
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Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realise why it never worked out with anyone else.
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05-25-2011 09:09
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The easiest way to not be offended by a joke, is to stop being a cu^t.
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05-25-2011 08:45
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If you were any smarter I could teach you to fetch.
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05-25-2011 08:38 by
Marshall the Great
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