Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon i know you have an open mind..... I can see what's in ur head...nothing
←Rate | 06-08-2011 04:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mother in Law , pls don't teach me how to handle my children. I'm living with one of yours and he sure needs a lot of improvement ;)
←Rate | 06-08-2011 04:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Problem is people confuse LOVE with BUSINESS. If you are with her because she gives the best BJs and she is with you because you pay all her bills then thats not a LOVE affair, that's just a BUSINESS arrangement.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 03:24 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ground is soft this time of year. But burying a body is hot, sweaty work. And that's how the lemonade industry gets you.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 01:30 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I look at cold sores as a reflection of too much trust 
←Rate | 06-08-2011 00:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watching "The Voice" and can't help but think that Cee Lo looks like Carl Winslow.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 00:25 by Mike D Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dominos use to be made with saddness and disappointment with just a sprinkle of fry grease and hooker spit once, but now it's made with "real cheese" and failure.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 00:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Domino's pizza is now made with real cheese." Well, WTF where you using before?
←Rate | 06-07-2011 23:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You have the perfect face for the radio.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 23:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear students, I know when you`re texting. Seriously, no one just looks down at their crotch and smiles. Sincerely, teacher.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 23:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When going commando the the word "hurry" should not even be in your vocabulary.. just sayin.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 23:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one damn night!"
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:38 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you didn't hear it with your OWN ears or see it with your OWN eyes, don't go passing it on with your OWN damn mouth!"
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A man's home might be his castle, but his wife is usually the one who rules it.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The more people I meet, the more I like my damn dog.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:02 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Seriously, there's a fine line between tan and looking liked you rolled around in Doritos.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 22:00 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dont wear white shorts and a blue thong and get mad when our eyes lock...thats like sitting at a bar and getting mad when the bartender asks if you want a drink
←Rate | 06-07-2011 21:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon it just me or did anyone else notice that Bob Marley never looked like a "Bob."
←Rate | 06-07-2011 21:28 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon thankful that Anthony Weiner's last name wasnt 'Butthole'.
←Rate | 06-07-2011 21:20 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering why I have NEVER seen a pregnant Asian?? Where's all the Most Fruitful Yuki's hidin anyway??
←Rate | 06-07-2011 21:12 by Trish Comments (0)  



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