Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon always reads the Terms of Service before clicking install just like everyone else... right?
←Rate | 06-10-2011 01:43 by Steve OH Comments (0)  


   messageicon For Sale: New Nunchucks. Will consider trading for a bag of ice and a new set of marbles.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 01:37 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Breaking news: Lebron James is taking his talents to Vancouver. Found out they only have to play 3 periods in the NHL, not 4.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 01:05 by @qpid901 Comments (0)  


   messageicon asks...the difference between my boss and the pope? The pope only expects me to kiss his ring
←Rate | 06-09-2011 23:42 by mullerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when you are driving on the freeway and someone cuts in front of you so you flip them off, only to have them put their hand up in a gesture of "thanks".
←Rate | 06-09-2011 23:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon That awkward moment when you've been drinking, waiting for your girl come over and she calls to say she being arrested and needs you to come get her car from the cops before it gets impounded.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 23:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you need help in a hurry at Best Buy... just begin shoving a CD in your pants.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 22:47 by @The69Sheriff Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I ever get married again, the woman I marry must have worked at Subway at some point in their life. I need to know they have experience making me sammiches. :-)
←Rate | 06-09-2011 22:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon feels like this thing has turned into an FML website... but they arent even funny now
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hooters girls may be hot, but subway girls are wife material. They stand behind the counter, put whatever you want on your sandwich, and then clean up the kitchen
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mom trying to play Call of Duty, and she thinks the Kill Cam is her killing someone. Getting tired of hearing "I GOT ONE!".....every 5 seconds...
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook .... the online version of "Jerry Springer" .... but more entertaining.....
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kim Kardasian is marrying a player on the New Jersey Nets. At least someone on that team is scoring!
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you've never played Tetris, you're probably useless at loading a dishwasher.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 21:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear women::: Would it kill you to have a beer and watch the game instead of nagging..!!!!!
←Rate | 06-09-2011 20:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pulling your phone out in front of your friends has the same effect as yawning.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 20:45 by @The69Sheriff Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders.. Why do we say "heads up" when we actually mean duck?
←Rate | 06-09-2011 20:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Awkward moment when this random person waves at you, so you wave back and then you figure out they where waving to the person behind you :O
←Rate | 06-09-2011 20:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon about to play with all the big, cute doggys at the police station
←Rate | 06-09-2011 18:26 by Catherine Comments (0)  


   messageicon Heres one for MythBusters: See if she can really suck a golf ball thru a garden hose.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 18:13 Comments (0)  



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