Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I guess I'll pick up my dog's poop this time since you're having a yardsale and all.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 09:25 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon the best sort of perfection in life, funnily enough, comes in the form of imperfection!
←Rate | 06-25-2011 09:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay, technology is getting out of hand for me. I was looking through a pair binochulars this morning and when I finished I looked for the button to turn them off.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 09:09 by K-Mac Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you say your grandpa is looking down at you and smiling I'm just going to assume you also have one of those mean drunken roof grandpas.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 07:57 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not sure what's going on. C-3PO and R2-D2 just abruptly took off in a cruiser and said they were headed to New York.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 07:41 by Luke Skywalker Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do you call a woman who doesn't think she belongs in the kitchen? Divorced.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 01:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife says "Its uncomfortable going to the new OB. My legs are wide open 3 min after we meet." I said, So do 99% of the girls on Craigslist.
←Rate | 06-25-2011 00:59 by @demiroquai Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only people happier than NY gays tonight are NY divorce lawyers..........
←Rate | 06-25-2011 00:21 by sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yay NY!!! Now, if the gays could only legally smoke pot at their wedding...
←Rate | 06-25-2011 00:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Facebook would have been a college...i would have got a certificate for full attendance
←Rate | 06-24-2011 23:43 by darsh_7 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someday I hope to solve one of the great mysteries of life, like where do socks go when you put them into the dryer?
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:54 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon rumors ? oh wellll ; at least you're spreading something else besides your legs.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who dream big sleep a lot.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:52 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon No one can change a person, but someone can be a person`s reason to change
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:22 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Apparently you shouldn't ever answer a girl's text message with “k.” Bad idea.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:20 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spotted on the back of a T-shirt worn by LAPD Bomb Squad: If you see me running, try to keep up.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:18 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gang=A bunch of chickenshits who can't do anything alone....
←Rate | 06-24-2011 22:07 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is tough; it's even tougher when you're stupid.~~John Wayne
←Rate | 06-24-2011 21:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever start to turn numb because you have your AC turned up on max, but you don't want to turn it down because it's 110 deg outside?
←Rate | 06-24-2011 21:48 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook Friends = 427 Friends When I have To Move = 0
←Rate | 06-24-2011 20:28 by levon Comments (0)  



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