Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I like my coffee like I like my women .Strong, sweet & hot :)
←Rate | 06-24-2011 02:50 by the energy Comments (0)  


   messageicon You will never hear me say things like "I would never wish it upon my worst enemy", hell if you are my worst enemy I would wish it upon you ten-fold.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 02:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I really like this hoity-toity hospital...they have 2 ply Toliet Paper
←Rate | 06-24-2011 02:25 by cg Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't wait for someone else to write the ending of a story that you started from the beginning.
←Rate | 06-24-2011 02:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Awesome story dude.... Which chapter do you shut the f**k up?
←Rate | 06-24-2011 00:50 by Elbow Comments (0)  


   messageicon those sweet kind words you encraved in my mind, do me a favor and chocke on them.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 23:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I live the same as I type: Fast and with lots of mistakes.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 22:35 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is like a sports car: It goes too fast, and it costs too much.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 22:34 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are porn DVDs 8 hours long? I was done before the opening credits.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 21:43 by Jackbrass Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have 14 friends that liked Lil Wayne. I should delete you all.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 20:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon WAIT! Justine Bieber has a perfume out for woman called "Someday"? What? Someday he'll be one of them?
←Rate | 06-23-2011 20:10 by Johnny660 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think cartoon characters should age every season, I wouldn't mind if alot of them were killed off due to old age.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 19:39 by Jackbrass Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the g-string is any indicator, the g-spot is somewhere near the anus.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 19:26 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon : You're the reason why God invented the middle finger.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 19:13 by Elbow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok, give the Southwest Airlines pilot a break....at least he woke up the air traffic controllers!
←Rate | 06-23-2011 18:48 by corinne1957 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a doctor's note to excuse the rotten stench I leave in people's bathrooms.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 18:25 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon I only speak to telemarketers when they refer to me as 'Your Highness' and if they keep taking off a piece of clothing every 30 seconds.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 18:22 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon My car smells like if you were somehow able to get inside a potato.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 17:38 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rain, and gloom every day......like Forks, but no hot vampires
←Rate | 06-23-2011 17:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So if Justin Bieber has his own cologne...I def think its about time I came up with one of my own..Not sure what too call it tho..They say you should name it after things you like..So I am really leaning toward naming it "Ode to BoobiesVajayjayNinjaFight"
←Rate | 06-23-2011 16:55 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  



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