Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon A*s....its the theme of the day! I feel like it, look like it, hopefully don't smell like it and probably am one!
←Rate | 07-03-2011 12:42 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing says your celebrating the birth of our Nation, like the smell of Gunpowder and Beer..
←Rate | 07-03-2011 12:20 by Wolf Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't wake up, eat & then go back to sleep, you're doing Sunday wrong.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 12:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon she may be from Kentucky but she is still one hell of a throat yodleler...
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pain is nature's way of saying, "Don't do that." Painkillers are mankind's way of saying, "Just watch me."
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:34 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon They're not "Used Cars" anymore, they're "Pre-owned" I suggest "Divorce" be changed to "Pre-Loved"
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:23 by Bruce Comments (0)  


   messageicon Apparently if you have my good looks and go to a nude beach everyone gets jealous and they make you put your clothing back on.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:17 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Getting some cans of gas to make this years homemade fireworks show more entertaining.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:16 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just like a baby I like to drink my dinner from a bottle.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 11:16 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Q: What do you have when Hillary Clinton is at the beach buried up to her neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 10:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are no automatic doors. Just gentlemen ninjas.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 10:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you look at life like a piano where the white keys represent happiness & the black keys represent sadness. As life goes on you realize the black keys make music too...d;^)
←Rate | 07-03-2011 09:53 by Mcarn Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you drank too much last night when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 09:39 by Tammy A F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hiccups: Karma's way of saying " I'm busy right now, but heres a lil somethin something to annoy the shit out of you for a while
←Rate | 07-03-2011 08:43 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hear about Sarah Palin and Michelle Obama posing nude for magazines lately? Yeah Sarah Palin was seen in playboy and Michelle Obama was discovered in National Geographics!!
←Rate | 07-03-2011 08:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife told me " it would be nice if you loaded the dishwasher once in a while after we eat." So after dinner tonight I'm going to buy her a 5th of jack.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 06:11 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left now turn it to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 05:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You are proudly invited to my BBQ party on the 4th where a large gathering of people will proudly display their dependance of alcohol on independence day!
←Rate | 07-03-2011 04:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon you know you are the luckiest person when ur on the beach in the middle of 10's of people and a Pigeon decides to send you regards from above.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 03:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I fall down a public venue, "Did anyone see me" totally outranks "Am I ok" on the thought process.
←Rate | 07-03-2011 00:49 Comments (0)  



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