Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Say what you want about drunk people, but at least they've had all their shots.
←Rate | 07-23-2011 02:26 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wanna give a minute to thank GOD for me being born in the era with A/C.
←Rate | 07-23-2011 02:13 by @DesignsByQPid Comments (0)  


   messageicon Worse thing about having a couple ex's in group of friends. I always have to check the attending list on Facebook events before confirming.
←Rate | 07-23-2011 01:03 by Will Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Please do not take my kindness for weakness. Because I will not be afraid to knock you the hell out!
←Rate | 07-23-2011 00:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, Red Bull, you know what else gives us wings? Kotex. There seems to be a slam dunk marketing opportunity here that someone is missing.
←Rate | 07-23-2011 00:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Chris Schwarzenegger should be less concerned with the collapsed lung and more with the fact that his family has a replacement standing by.
←Rate | 07-23-2011 00:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gotta love AC with this heat, but damn it's colder than a witches ( . ) in here...
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:34 by Massena43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The U.S. is moving closer and closer to defaulting on our debt... maybe we should ask Citibank, Bank of America and GM to bail us out...
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:33 by JaxWylde Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dude... I just walked outside and my air conditioner flipped me the finger!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I get multiple friend requests on MySpace, my pager goes crazy.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:19 by Shuttdogg Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a reason Congress begins with the word con. Con is the oppsosite of pro, so Congress must be the opposite of progress.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 23:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lazy Rule #15: Be sure your woman is trained to bring a sandwich after going to pound town.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 22:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lazy Rule #14: If you drop the ice cube, just kick it under the fridge or the stove...
←Rate | 07-22-2011 22:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who say "I'm beside myself" are often mistaken.... with the notable exception of time travellers and Siamese twins.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 22:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The word is RUMORS dumbass, kinda like the ones we heard about you not being funny. Except that one turned out to be true.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 21:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dont Drink and Drive....Drink and call AAA and say "my car is Fooked up just tow it to my house"
←Rate | 07-22-2011 20:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The News said its going to be 99 Degrees today but its going to feel like 110.... B!c$h, say its gone be 110 Degrees then!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 20:47 by ed status Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering if a bra is called an over the sholder bolder holder then what is mens underwear under the but nut hut?
←Rate | 07-22-2011 20:39 by :) Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best things in life are free until the government finds out and taxes it.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 19:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you think you're alone and nobody notices you, try not paying your bills.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 19:31 Comments (0)  



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