Staring at a text for 5 minutes trying to figure out how to reply while secretly thinking, damn it's a good thing we aren't talking face to face, I'd be screwed!
I hate when I have trouble opening a jar or bottle I closed myself earlier -- a time when, obviously, I possessed superhuman strength and no regard for the weaker me I would eventually become.
I just found out that a married couple I know share the same birthday with each other. I said "WOW, Twins!". They said "Uh, nooo..." I said, "Then why are your kids so stupid?"
A lot of people constantly complain about Monday's, Tuesday's and Wednesday's being the worst part of the week, I have discovered that with the right mix of Jack Daniels and sleeping pills those days no longer have to happen.
INSTALLING RAIN FOR TEXAS ████ 44% DONE... please wait. Installation failed. Please try again.404 error:Rain not found. Weather "Rain" cannot be located. The weather you are looking for might have been removed, had its name changed or temp. unavai