Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon VMA recap: Lady GaGa came in as a man. Nicki Minaj came as Lady GaGa, and Jay-z came in Beyonce
←Rate | 08-30-2011 22:25 by SlowMotionNinja Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's not the destination, it's the journey. Except when you're heading to the bathroom with explosive diarrhea
←Rate | 08-30-2011 22:25 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can save a lot of money by walking face-first into a spiderweb every morning instead of buying coffee
←Rate | 08-30-2011 21:03 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This girl got all pissed off at me because I was reading the back of her pants......so what if I was trying to read it in braille
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:58 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do I need scissors to open a pack of scissors anyway...the whole point of buying scissors is that I don't f**king have any
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:48 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sitting here watching thousands of dollars worth of food be thrown away on Hell's Kitchen while I eat my Ramen Noodles
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:46 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why haven't they proved/disproved the myth "Once you go black you never go back" on Myth Busters?
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:45 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When non-smokers come to My house....I ask them to stand outside while I have a smoke
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:43 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Teenage pregnancy just dropped 50% due to the release of Madden12
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:43 by @Kid_Eddi88 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why does every Nickelodeon and Disney actor/actress have to be given a Record Deal? Just because they can act, doesn't mean they can SING.
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:37 by @Kid_Eddi88 Ed Status Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I wasn't that drunk.."Dude, you hugged an old guy with a white beard and cried, "DUMBLEDORE, YOU'RE BACK!"
←Rate | 08-30-2011 20:36 by Ed Status Comments (0)  


   messageicon moves like jagger
←Rate | 08-30-2011 19:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it when women are on their "that time of month" do they have to feel like they have to fly around the room on a broom and beat you with it??
←Rate | 08-30-2011 19:43 by urboyblue Comments (0)  


   messageicon What is about public restrooms that make people go, "Yeah, I'm just not going to flush"
←Rate | 08-30-2011 19:39 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey guy walking down the street talking on bluetooth with a bag in one hand and nothing in the other, please use your free hand to slap yourself
←Rate | 08-30-2011 19:00 by Joseph Robert Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering which foreign countries are currently helping US during this Hurricane Irene clean up effort... (including shelter and food for the families whose lifestyles were turned upside down)
←Rate | 08-30-2011 18:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11 months old
←Rate | 08-30-2011 18:39 by dexter Comments (0)  


   messageicon So this "Planking" thing... laying face down on various objects... I've been doing that forever. I call it "Sleeping" though.
←Rate | 08-30-2011 18:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So my tailbone has been killing me cause I'm putting in extra hours working. I talked to the nurse about it. She said and I quote "stop sitting on your ass so much".
←Rate | 08-30-2011 18:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some girl at the nightclub last night said to me, "I get 20 times more girls than you do, haha." I replied, "20 x 0 = 0." That shut the focker up.
←Rate | 08-30-2011 17:31 Comments (0)  



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