Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon anybody else ever shave your balls and instantly regret it?
←Rate | 09-20-2011 22:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I could totally be on jeopardy, as an audience member...
←Rate | 09-20-2011 22:19 by Alexspaz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't mind coming to work… but this 8 hours wait is bulls#$%
←Rate | 09-20-2011 21:49 by skertchly Comments (0)  


   messageicon If she's still wearing silly bands, she's to young for you bro.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 21:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon had a date tonight...& didnt need chloroform
←Rate | 09-20-2011 21:11 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wondering how much of my tax money was used to fuel up the marine helicopters used to bring the trainers in for the biggest loser. Now I'm paying for fat people to lose weight? Wtf!
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can memorize twenty song lyrics before I can memorize one answer to a question on a test -_-
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Putting you're offline chat on Facebook so it actually looks like you have a life and don't sit on Facebook all day.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:05 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't understand why people reward others with "brownie points." I can't eat or buy anything with those. Just bake the f*cking brownies.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:04 by @dj_soltrix Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girls ignore nice guys, Chase a$#holes, Then they have the nerve to complain about it..
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:03 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon New Yorkers get such a bad rap for being rude. I was visiting relatives in Manhattan, and some guy walked up to me and asked, "Excuse me,can you tell me how to get to the Empire State Building, or should I just go f**k myself?"
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:03 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sunglasses; they allow you to stare at people without being caught..
←Rate | 09-20-2011 20:01 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon it would be pretty sweet if reposts came with audio set to the Price is Right Losing Horn.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 19:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I see some people on Twitter/Facebook, then see them in person, I realize, ohhhh they use the new skin cream called Adobe Photoshop.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 19:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes you gotta remind the hen who the rooster is.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 18:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've fallen down the stairs before. I don't see what joy the Slinky gets out of it. That sh!t hurts.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 18:52 by Hot Tea Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to like things on facebook I don't like so I can unlike them.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 18:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're short when you can see your feet in your driver's license!
←Rate | 09-20-2011 18:02 by AznSensation Comments (0)  


   messageicon When a cop pulls you over for doing 32 in a 30, I dont advise calling him a Nazi, unless you are looking for 3 square meals a day and a shower, fml
←Rate | 09-20-2011 17:53 by SEAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got accepted into my freinds "Recipie Exchange" here on facebook. I'm gonna start posting lots of pictures of Road Kill for my ingredients!
←Rate | 09-20-2011 17:40 Comments (0)  



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