Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon The idiot that wrote about the "Porshes and Mexicans" knows how to spell Porsche.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 10:01 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend's name is SLEEP, and I get some every night.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 09:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just read that A.C. Nielsen Jr., pioneer of TV ratings firm, died yesterday as well, but due to news of Steve Jobs it was overlooked and Mr. Nielsen only received an 8.5 rating.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 08:51 by hoosiergatorfan Comments (0)  


   messageicon the idiot who wrote about the Porshes and Mexicans, the last time I check people in the US cant afford to buy a car
←Rate | 10-06-2011 08:29 by Thats_racists Comments (1)  


   messageicon All 911 decals have been removed from Police cars in an effort to dissuade Mexicans from stealing them who think they're Porsches.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 07:40 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doing work on the bathroom, went to Lowe's and, long story short, still not mature enough to ask for caulk without laughing
←Rate | 10-06-2011 06:02 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only difference between a sink and urinal is an opinion
←Rate | 10-06-2011 06:00 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good: Your son's finally maturing Bad: He's involved with the woman next door Worse: So are you
←Rate | 10-06-2011 05:39 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sex is like math. Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope you don't multiply!
←Rate | 10-06-2011 05:36 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good: You give the birds and bees talk to your daughter Bad: She keeps interrupting Worse: With corrections
←Rate | 10-06-2011 05:33 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll be sober tomorrow but you'll be ugly for the rest of your life.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 05:05 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you want to mourn Steve Jobs? - There's an app for that, only $4.99 for the first month.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 05:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was just going to nail some shelves to the wall, then I thought, screw them!
←Rate | 10-06-2011 03:26 by AlcaponeLikwid Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is just like an ice-cream, enjoy it before it melts !!
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:54 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Steve Jobs death is being treated as suspicious... Police are looking for iWitnesses
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Steve Jobs says, "The only way Apple devices will get Flash is over my dead body."
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Three Apples changed the world. The first one tempted Eve, the second inspired Newton and the third was offered to the world half eaten by Steve Jobs. RIP
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:29 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women are like stamps. We lick them and send them on their way.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:28 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you truly understand me, you'll let me be annoying
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:26 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Google Maps, Please extend your street view to the rural parts of the country. I'm trying to find out which field I left my virginity in. Sincerely, anonymous
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:25 Comments (0)  



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