Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4408 of 5593

   messageicon Every girl has a slutty friend. If you don't, then you are the slutty friend.
←Rate | 10-08-2011 03:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its amazing how the people with no job always have a bag of weed on them.
←Rate | 10-08-2011 03:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you thank God for not looking like Rick Ross or Chris Bosh today?
←Rate | 10-08-2011 03:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mom thinks LOL stands for "lots of love" and texted me "Your Grandma just died. LOL."
←Rate | 10-08-2011 02:11 by ambii Comments (0)  


   messageicon Obama quit smoking for his health? Dude the diseases you catch from screwing the entire country is gunna kill you first
←Rate | 10-08-2011 01:54 by stuklikechuk Comments (0)  


   messageicon $2.75 Trojans or $19.99 Huggies?? You make the decision.
←Rate | 10-08-2011 00:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The number one lie in the whole world is...i swear I will love you forever..
←Rate | 10-07-2011 23:10 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today's Facebook forecast: Partly boring, increased drama, and a really good chance of bulls**t.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 23:00 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon My gym bag is so funny. Today it was like “What does the outside of your car trunk look like?” and “What's a gym?”
←Rate | 10-07-2011 22:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't you hate when your friends embarrass you in front of your real friends
←Rate | 10-07-2011 22:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What kind of jerk would put a cat in a bag? I'm just so relieved it's out.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 22:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tries to make his burps sounds like a Transformer.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 22:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've given up looking for my soulmate. Just looking for a holemate now.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 22:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Running Man may no longer be a trendy dance move but it's still a totally great way to get out of a boring conversation.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 21:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon walked into a woman on the street today which is weird because va-ginas aren't usually that big...
←Rate | 10-07-2011 21:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm gonna go all Kazoo solo and Haiku Freestyle on the next person that says I'm not Gangsta!!!
←Rate | 10-07-2011 17:59 by migasjoe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drugs may be the road to nowhere, but at least they're the scenic route.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 17:36 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon obama first black to go in the white house wiith out a brush
←Rate | 10-07-2011 16:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm going to go protest corporations todmorrow. I'll wear my shirt from Macy's, grab my Cannon camera, hop in my Jeep® Grand Cherokee Laredo and tell my friends on facebook® (via my iPhone) to join me! (We'll be meetin up afterward at Starbucks)
←Rate | 10-07-2011 16:39 by Jay Son Comments (0)  


   messageicon You might be a redneck if ya get divorced, re married and still have the same "in law's"
←Rate | 10-07-2011 15:55 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left